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"I'll probably go to my holiday home at my private beach and do a bit of sailing in my 50 foot yacht. What will you be doing over Christmas?" "Cursing you." 5 December, 2005.
"Your Minister's cell phone bill is way higher than the other Ministers!" "He conducts most of his business in the field... or to be more precise - the fairway." 14 January, 2006.
"Yes, Prime Minister. I'm sure I can handle the portfolio with tact and diplomacy." "I've been made Minister of Johnnie Foreigners." 19 October, 2005.
"Perhaps you should think about having some 'body tailoring' plastic surgery." "Forget it! I don't do pain...And I certainly don't do expensive pain!" 11 November, 2005.
"How goes the Minister's meeting with Treasury?" "He said their call for tax cuts was an idealogical burp ......And he sneezed at the idea." 18 November, 2005.
"We need to reduce the size of government bureaucracy." "I'll get right on to it. We'll need to create a new government department to organise it all." 21 November, 2005.
"The cost of the new prisons has changed yet again... It's now $210 million more than first estimated." "No wonder he's called Minister of Corrections, that's all he makes." 20 January, 2006.
"Yes Minister. There are no problems here, everything is running smoothly... It's safe for you to come back to the office for a few days." 28 December, 2005.
"It's been decided not to put the legislation to stop MPs party-hopping through parliament, just in case......you wanted to change parties." 12 November, 2005.
"One thing I'd NEVER do is use a cell phone while driving! I like to keep both hands on the club." 19 January, 2006.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'You've only got enough party funds to fight a short election campaign.' 'How short?' 'You'd better hope the PM calls the election tomorrow.' The Dominion, 26 April 2002.
"The lake levels are low......and the weather forecasters are predicting a dry summer". "That should do the trick!" 3 December, 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The PM said your remarks were totally unacceptable for a well-respected, important Minister to make!....So it's just as well you're not.'The Dominion, 23 April 2002.
"Are these govt limos gas-guzzlers - what does it take to fill her up?" "About five taxpayers." 28 January, 2006.
"Our support of GM is losing us votes! Do we stick to our decision or do we reverse it?" "It depends on how important popularity is to you." BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! 7 October, 2003.
"Phone calls get recorded, emails and memos get leaked - how are you supposed to send sensitive information these days?!!!" "There's someone in the government buildings doing semaphore." 16 March, 2006.
"The school examination system needs to be simplified." "So a child can understand it?" "So the Minister in charge can understand it." 30 December, 2005.
"Are we travelling 1st class, business or economy?" "We're flying on a 30-year old Air Force plane. It's 'Will we make it?' class." 17 October, 2002.
"Caucus is willing to overlook my outspoken comments and move me back up the party list. With conditions." "How long do you have to wear the muzzle for?" 10 November, 2005.
"I'm thinking of asking the PM not to consider me for a cabinet position... so I can spend more time with my money." 6 October, 2005.
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