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"The Minister's very busy at the moment but he might be able to see you for a few minutes......During the drinks break." 11 January, 2003.
"Here's your script." "Script for what?" "Your off-the-cuff answers." 16 June, 2003.
"I'll probably go to my holiday home at my private beach and do a bit of sailing in my 50 foot yacht. What will you be doing over Christmas?" "Cursing you." 5 December, 2005.
"They're calling you the 'rubber man'." "Because I keep bouncing back?" "Because you'd bend over backwards for any publicity." 20 November, 2002.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Does the Minister want to see the questions I'm going to ask him?' 'No....But YOU might like to see the questions you're going to ask him.' The Dominion Post, 13 July, 2002.
"The number of people on the hospital waiting list has been drastically reduced!" "Where have they gone?" "They're on the waiting list for the waiting list." 14 March, 2003.
"Your Minister's cell phone bill is way higher than the other Ministers!" "He conducts most of his business in the field... or to be more precise - the fairway." 14 January, 2006.
Webb, Murray, 1947- :Trevor Mallard. Right! Now bugger off! [ca 16 February 2004]
"Which frequency do you think we should choose to broadcast parliament on?" "One only dogs can hear!" 24 January, 2003.
"These are the new regulations designed to get dirty vehicles off our roads. You look worried - what did you come to work in?" "A cloud of smoke." 22 September, 2003.
"No, I'm afraid Helen's at the South Pole. No, those ministers are at the Lahar Dam. No, Jim Anderton has been sent to Iraq. Actually there is no-one here. They're all in Hell spots around the world training for the next Parliamentary session" 19 January 2007
"Yes, Prime Minister. I'm sure I can handle the portfolio with tact and diplomacy." "I've been made Minister of Johnnie Foreigners." 19 October, 2005.
"A reporter wants to know if the economic recovery is due to good luck rather than good management. Shall I send her in?" "Hide my horseshoe collection first." 1 January, 2003.
Steve Maharey. 11 November, 2005.
"The PM said I'd been dropped from the Cabinet because of my poor communication skills." "What did you say?" "Uhhn? 2 November, 2007
"The party conference was a disaster!" "Why do you say that?" "We didn't get any time to go skiing!!!" 14 July, 2003.
"Has the government come out in favour of GM-Free?" "Almost. We've decided to Free-GM. 14 February, 2003.
"Perhaps you should think about having some 'body tailoring' plastic surgery." "Forget it! I don't do pain...And I certainly don't do expensive pain!" 11 November, 2005.
"According to these calculations the amount of funding I claimed for staffing is completely fair. I used the Duckworth-Lewis system." 6 March, 2003.
"Isn't it amazing how the work piles up while you're away!" "It's going to take me at least two trips to carry it over to your desk!" 7 January, 2003.
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