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"The public don't care when the election date is? Aahh.. Well.. Sorry but EVERY DAY I see someone who's DESPERATE to know the date....." 14 July, 2005
"Fancy a Tango?" Greens. 3 June, 2005
Deep in the wilderness, the male Kakapo hollows out a courtship bowl and begins to boom in the forlorn hope of attracting a mate! "COALITION! COALITION!" 2 September, 2005
RECYCLING... Elections. Egotists. Optimists. Wannabes. Losers & loners. Vote Goryl. Testes. Sunday News, 16 September 2005
[Exclusive brethren] 28 November, 2006
"They're getting away on us Michael! What do we doooo?" "Hoist another BRIBE of course!" 7 September, 2005
"There's also a woman with an albatross around her neck... & a guy with a monkey on his back." 22 February, 2005
"More cream" Sunday News, 14 October 2005
"Not again! Flamin' baggage carrying bludgers!" Election '05. Past. Failed. Promises. 15 April, 2005
HEALTH THREAT TO YOUNG & ELDERLY. ELECTIONEERING DISEASE IS ON THE LOOSE. Passed on by too much Granny hugging and baby kissing. COMING SOON TO AN AREA NEAR YOU! Kissy Kissy. 27 July, 2005
Government road code... 11 August, 2005
[Bond severed] 22 March, 2005
"So Mr Clarkson... How do you respond to accusations that you have a fascination with your testicles?" "BOLLOCKS!" 16 September, 2005
"Shoosh everyone! They're broadcasting the latest threats from terrorists!" "Who are they from tonight? Clark, Peters or Brash?" 14 September, 2005
"On the count of three Helen!" 25 July, 2005
"Hey aren't sucker fish meant to hang on quietly for the ride?" 13 September, 2005
"Desperate Beehives!" THE SOAP THAT'S SWEEPING THE WHOLE COUNTRY BY SNOWSTORM! Lust. Deceit. Bed-hopping. Polygamy. Extra-martial dalliance. Bad acting and like all soaps, full of nerdy characters... 22 September, 2005
"We need that lot to move more to the centre." 8 August, 2005
[Don Brash] Sunday News, 21 October 2005
"That it! I'm voting Labour!" "I like their health policy!" "Says they're gonna fund 10,000 extra joint procedures!" 17 August, 2005
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