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We're introducing a tough new Welfare Policy. It's called 'Work or else!' "Else?" "It's still a bit short on detail." 11 February, 2006.
"Good news - there's no need to worry about your slip of the tongue... No one was listening to a word you were saying." 28 November, 2005.
Lynch, James Robert, 1947- :"Let's play ministers and public servants! I'll be the minister and fish for power, glory and votes and you be the public servant and carry the can!" 26 February 1984
Evans, Malcolm Paul, 1945- :Maurice Williamson resigns. 1 May 2014
"I'll probably go to my holiday home at my private beach and do a bit of sailing in my 50 foot yacht. What will you be doing over Christmas?" "Cursing you." 5 December, 2005.
"We're not allowed to do anything any more, we've turned into a nanny state!!" "Don't shout. You might damage your vocal cords." 18 January, 2006.
"Could you pass me my gardening gloves? The Minister wants the dirt file on opposition MPs". 17 March, 2006.
"When can we expect to see more police on our streets?" "Soon. Their patrol cars are starting to disintegrate." 15 November, 2005.
"Do you realise that as we speak, many of the population are living in substandard conditions?" "I take it you don't like summer camping holidays." 26 December, 2005.
"There will be no more school closures." 29 September, 2005.
"We're collecting more tax than we need. That is unacceptable! Find more ways of spending it." 8 November, 2005.
"I want a new ministerial advisor - one that doesn't try and tell me what to do all the time!" "I'd like to place an advert for a ministerial toady." 11 January, 2006.
"MPs have decided not to reduce the number of us in parliament in the interests of public health. People would die of shock if we did." 18 March, 2006.
"I thought you said your budget would have something for everyone?" "I said something FROM everyone." 7 March, 2006.
"If I cancel the taxcuts will the public start thinking I'm a skinflint?" "No. They already think that, you'll just be confirming it." 17 February, 2006.
"I will not have MPs sneaking off on tax-payer funded junkets... overseas. "... Without me." 11 March, 2006.
"The Prime Minister has complete faith in me as duty minister while everyone is away on holiday!" "How often does she phone in to check on things?" "Every fifteen minutes." 13 January, 2006.
"Is the PM still calling for my resignation?" "No. She's now screaming for it." 22 October, 2002.
"Introducing tax breaks for the horse racing industry should create huge benefits......for me next time I go to the races." 14 March, 2006.
"I managed to clear my desk of paperwork before I go on my Xmas break!" "How did you mange that?" "I put it all on your desk." 16 December, 2005.
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