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"Here's your election pledge card." 18 August, 2005
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Do you think the PM's motorcade travels too fast?' 'I'd rather not comment' 'You're travelling in it today.' 'Pass me my crash helmet.' The Dominion Post, 22 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'A high ranking Govt official is warning of civil war!' 'No one in their right mind would take that sort of talk seriously.' 'Where's the Minister?' 'Beefing up the armed forces.' The Dominion Post, 4 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'My department's found occupations for thousands of unemployed people - and this is all the thanks I get!' 'Malingering isn't an occupation.' The Dominion Post, 28 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Our proud to be red-blooded males' stance has struck a chord with men everywhere. We should celebrate!' 'Yeah!' 'What sort of things do red-blodded males do?' 'I've no idea.' The Dominion Post, 3 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'People are saying the number of people in your cabinet is far too large.' 'Nonsense!' 'When will you be holding your first cabinet meeting?' 'As soon as we find a stadium big enough.' The Dominion Post, 16 August 2002.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Why was your motorcade travelling at such a high speed?' 'Because of death threats.' 'Who made them?' 'Several people who were run off the road.' The Dominion Post, 23 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952-:"The consensus of opinion seems to be that our leader's job is safe..." 30 March 2011
Fletcher, David 1952- : "They've put you way down the party list." ... 12 April 2011
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The minister's in trouble because he accepted a golden handshake of $195,000.' '$195,000!!!... That's not a handshake- that's an all-embracing hug!' Dominion Post, 16 October 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We have to start being nice to the Greens. We may need them as a coalition partner....Stop kissing babies and start hugging trees.' The Dominion Post, 20 July, 2002.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Businesses will soon begin moving to countries with lower tax rates!' 'Then we must act quickly... and milk them for all we can before they go.' Dominion Post 8 November 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'You've been told to keep your mouth shut for a while.' 'By the PM?' 'By the country's cartoonists- they can't handle the huge volume of material you've been supplying them with!' Dominion Post, 12 April 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We need to toughen up on hate speech.' 'I quite agress. Which poor people are being subjected to it?' 'Your staff.' The Dominion Post, 7 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We've found a private plane for the PM that the country can afford!' 'Great! How old is it?' 'She'll need goggles and a scarf.' The Dominion Post, 26 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The PM wants a private plane for travelling around the country.' 'What does she travel on at the moment?' 'The tax payer.' The Dominion Post, 24 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The PM wants you to take stress leave.' 'I am not stressed out!!!' 'No, but thanks to you the PM is!!!' Dominion Post, 20 April 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'As a government employee you wouldn't voice disapproval of my policies, would you?' 'Of course not. I just make changes to them when you're not looking.' The Dominion Post, 6 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I'm going to tell caucus I made the remarks because I was having a bad hair day!' 'You might want to get yourself some hair first!' Dominion Post, 11 April 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'You can't blame the PM for making us pledge our loyalty to the party.' 'No... But I thought making us sign in our own blood was going a bit far!' Dominion Post, 5 May 2004.
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