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"He was a drunken villager, then he was the first spear-thrower at Helm's Deep, and in the new one he's a pirate captain" "Ah" "Oh dear oh dear... Crawly references to LOTR and Wellington celebrities... Pseudo-topical drivel masquerading as satire... Snob humour disguised as WIT... Do you think anyone's ever been the SLIGHTEST bit interested in anything you three say or do?" "SECURITY" "Steady on Fitz... I like them" "It's time for a big, fat plug for a REAL cartoon!" 24 December, 2003
"I'm AMAZED America's going back to the Moon" "Well, that's where Saddam told them he hid the weapons of mass destruction" "Oh dear, Tony... Is that really the JOKE?" "Eh?" "You realise that was the FIRST thing thousands of people thought when they heard the news. It's really a very, very obvious joke. I think you should stand up and APOLOGISE to the whole cafe" "SORRY, everyone" "How was your holiday?" "Uncontentious" 14 January, 2004