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Fletcher, David, 1952- :Some people see your tough stance on crime as a vote-catching ploy. Don't you hate people that are like that?!! Cynical? Astute. The Dominion Post, 7 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Have you seen these latest poll results?!!!' 'Yes... It's time to do what this party does best!... Panic!' Dominion Post, 17 February 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'My party proposes government by referendum!' 'Is that what the people want?' 'I don't know. I haven't asked them.' The Dominion Post, 29 November, 2003.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'You've had a great deal of criticism over these job-creation schemes you've been funding...have they created any jobs?' 'I've had to employ several more spin doctors!' The Dominion Post, 13 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Do you think the PM's motorcade travels too fast?' 'I'd rather not comment' 'You're travelling in it today.' 'Pass me my crash helmet.' The Dominion Post, 22 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I told the PM the bad news - that I'm thinking of retiring at the next election.' 'And she hit you in the eye?!!!' 'No, the champagne cork did.' The Dominion Post, 16 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'A high ranking Govt official is warning of civil war!' 'No one in their right mind would take that sort of talk seriously.' 'Where's the Minister?' 'Beefing up the armed forces.' The Dominion Post, 4 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'My department's found occupations for thousands of unemployed people - and this is all the thanks I get!' 'Malingering isn't an occupation.' The Dominion Post, 28 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Our proud to be red-blooded males' stance has struck a chord with men everywhere. We should celebrate!' 'Yeah!' 'What sort of things do red-blodded males do?' 'I've no idea.' The Dominion Post, 3 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Why was your motorcade travelling at such a high speed?' 'Because of death threats.' 'Who made them?' 'Several people who were run off the road.' The Dominion Post, 23 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'All the political parties are the same these days!' 'You mean they're all centerist?' 'I mean they're all useless.' The Dominion Post, 26 November, 2003.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Business leaders have invited you to a dinner so they can tell you how tough things are for them at the moment. They're going to whine and dine you.' The Dominion Post, 15 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I will NOT put up with this kind of thing from a foreign government. Stop any high-level visits that are planned!' 'There aren't any planned.' 'Organise some so we can cancel them.' The Dominion Post, 17 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'There's a possibility of a back bench revolt!' 'Who's the ringleader?' 'The one with the pitchfork.' Dominion Post, 4 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We need to do some serious bridge building within the party to get the two factions back together.' 'The gap's too big for a bridge... You'll need a ferry service!' The Dominion Post, 19 November, 2003.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We need to increase election funding for party political broadcasts.' 'The public won't like that!' 'We'll do it gradually... We'll just increase our party's funding to start with!' Dominion Post, 9 March 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'You've been told to keep your mouth shut for a while.' 'By the PM?' 'By the country's cartoonists- they can't handle the huge volume of material you've been supplying them with!' Dominion Post, 12 April 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Here's the list of reshuffled portfolios. It looks like you've dropped in the party rankings!' 'Why, what have I been given?' 'The wooden spoon.' The Dominion Post, 12 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'These "meet the people" walkabouts seem awfully stage-managed.' 'They are not!!!' 'Who said that?' ' The director.' Dominion Post, 6 October 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'There will be no lowering of the tax rates for the wealthy!' 'There goes our party funding!' 'Because they won't have to pay any!!!' Dominion Post, 19 March 2004.
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