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Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Another one of those groups against school closures in here to see you.' 'Hat do this lot call themselves?' 'A lynch mob' Dominion Post, 3 March 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Tell the concerned parents I'll be looking at the school closures with "soft eyes".' 'What were you looking at them with, before?' 'A soft head.' Dominion Post, 2 March 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I sent a letter to the Qualifications Authority demanding to know why so many students are failing! Did you receive it?' 'Yes Minister, it's right here in front of me... You've failed grammar and spelling.' Dominion Post, 11 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Are we in mediation with the schools yet?' No. We can't agree on who should be the mediator... We need a mediator to mediate on who should mediate.' Dominion Post, 4 March 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The PM's given you a problem portfolio, education.' 'Education isn't a problem portfolio!' 'It will be after you've had it for a while.' Dominion Post, 24 December 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The people in charge of this project to improve maths skills in schools will need more funding that first thought.' 'Why?' 'They got their sums wrong.' Dominion Post, 25 June 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Now you've closed our local school it takes me two hours to drive my kids to school!' 'Two hours?!!!' 'They insist I go to school via your office so they can shout abuse at you.' Dominion Post, 28 January 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Have you got your speech for the teachers' conference?' 'I don't need one... I always get booed off the stage before I get a chance to speak.' Dominion Post, 5 April 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Are you aware of the new 'no surprises' policy? Ministers must be told about everything!' 'Yes.' 'Where is the Minister?' 'Buried under all that information.' Dominion Post, 17 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I've found some more little schools I can close down!' 'Is it your main ambition in life to close down all the small schools?' 'No!... It's more a hobby.' Dominion Post, 10 February 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I can't understand why my education reforms have been so widely condemed! They were formulated by the very people they affect.' 'Teachers?' 'Five year olds' Dominion Post, 15 April 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'My proposal to shut down more schools was met with threats, abuse and physical violence!' 'And that was just the Prime Minister.' Dominion Post, 28 February 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'That's a tidy nest egg you've got there! What are you saving up for?' 'My kids' free education!!!' Dominion Post, 22 January 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'There's been a blowout in community education funding. I'm not surprised- they have a course for everything these days!... You're doing one aren't you?' 'Yes... Advanced gobbledegook.' Dominion Post, 13 March 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The PM wants more physical activity.' 'In schools?' 'In your office.' Dominion Post, 7 October 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Schools want more funding... They're having to choose between buying books and paying for school maintenance.' 'Tell them to buy books on school maintenance.' Dominion Post 21 May 2004.
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