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"Amazing! I've never seen the kids so enthusiastic about their homework..." "I told them it was that or they had to watch John Key's new DVD." 29 November, 2007

"Amazing! I've never seen the kids so enthusiastic about their homework..." "I told them it was that or they had to watch John Key's new DVD." 29 November, 2007

"Consider us divorced." "And prepare to get Maoried..." 1 September, 2008

"Consider us divorced." "And prepare to get Maoried..." 1 September, 2008

"Another bumper year." 29 January 2009.

"Another bumper year." 29 January 2009.

"Sure we borrowed to pay for it, but our infrastructure is twice as flash!" 5 August, 2008

"Sure we borrowed to pay for it, but our infrastructure is twice as flash!" 5 August, 2008

$25,000. "Too dear? No problem! Flag the full tank of petrol with each new car and get half off the sticker price..." 31 October, 2007

$25,000. "Too dear? No problem! Flag the full tank of petrol with each new car and get half off the sticker price..." 31 October, 2007

Sold assets, cut services, endangered economy. "Mmmmmmm... Bigger cheese!" 30 September, 2008

Sold assets, cut services, endangered economy. "Mmmmmmm... Bigger cheese!" 30 September, 2008

'Rail and ferry biz - sold'. 6 May, 2008

'Rail and ferry biz - sold'. 6 May, 2008

"Any questions?" "What does it mean when my dad says Melissa Lee got royally screwed by her party?" 16 June 2009

"Any questions?" "What does it mean when my dad says Melissa Lee got royally screwed by her party?" 16 June 2009

"Didn't you know? The REAL presidential race is about to start..." 22 January 2009.

"Didn't you know? The REAL presidential race is about to start..." 22 January 2009.

Pow!! Pow!! Pow!! Pow!! "I'll need more training to face people as scary as these!" 19 March, 2008

Pow!! Pow!! Pow!! Pow!! "I'll need more training to face people as scary as these!" 19 March, 2008

"Now I KNOW the economy is stuffed!" 'Saved every measly penny and still lost it all... Please help.' 24 December, 2008.

"Now I KNOW the economy is stuffed!" 'Saved every measly penny and still lost it all... Please help.' 24 December, 2008.

"Are you one of those banks making obscene profits while our country suffers in recession?!!" "Y...Y...Yes..." "Great. It beats the hell out of investing in someplace making a loss..." 15 May 2009

"Are you one of those banks making obscene profits while our country suffers in recession?!!" "Y...Y...Yes..." "Great. It beats the hell out of investing in someplace making a loss..." 15 May 2009

"Since the government has withdrawn its support, we thought it was time for a new logo." 'Bye, Kiwi made.' 9 December, 2008.

The week in review. [1] Police raid suspected Christchurch spammer. "I think we've discovered why Canterbury men are rated as such good lovers!" [2] Scientists begin to decipher dolphin speech. "I wish you could speak so I'd know what you were thinking." "I wish you could think so T'd know what you're saying!" [3] "I brought my own naughty and nice list..." "Too bad snitches don't get ANY presents, My Dunne." 22 December, 2007

The week in review. [1] Police raid suspected Christchurch spammer. "I think we've discovered why Canterbury men are rated as such good lovers!" [2] Scientists begin to decipher dolphin speech. "I wish you could speak so I'd know what you were thinking." "I wish you could think so T'd know what you're saying!" [3] "I brought my own naughty and nice list..." "Too bad snitches don't get ANY presents, My Dunne." 22 December, 2007

"Pull the Tom Cruise biography or else!" "Yeah, our client doesn't want people to think he's an eccentric, paranoid, thin-skinned control freak!" 15 January, 2008

"Pull the Tom Cruise biography or else!" "Yeah, our client doesn't want people to think he's an eccentric, paranoid, thin-skinned control freak!" 15 January, 2008

"How could so many vulnerable people suffer while others did nothing?" '350 children die despite CYF being notified.' "Beats me." "Civilian casualties mount as the world continues to watch Gaza burn." 7 January 2009.

"How could so many vulnerable people suffer while others did nothing?" '350 children die despite CYF being notified.' "Beats me." "Civilian casualties mount as the world continues to watch Gaza burn." 7 January 2009.

"We're getting hit in the polls. From now on, it's back to avoiding of all the tough questions." "What if people ask us why?" "Avoid answering that." 2 October, 2007.

"We're getting hit in the polls. From now on, it's back to avoiding of all the tough questions." "What if people ask us why?" "Avoid answering that." 2 October, 2007.

"If you get into any trouble, I'll be saving Fisher & Paykel..." $25 million budget shortfall. 25 February 2009.

"If you get into any trouble, I'll be saving Fisher & Paykel..." $25 million budget shortfall. 25 February 2009.

Treaty payout. You win. "Damn, you sure have to lose a lot first ..." 12 February 2009.

Treaty payout. You win. "Damn, you sure have to lose a lot first ..." 12 February 2009.

"You mean, you... you already knew?!" "Don't worry, Peter, we still love you." "You're family, you can always come home." 28 October, 2008.

"You mean, you... you already knew?!" "Don't worry, Peter, we still love you." "You're family, you can always come home." 28 October, 2008.