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Fletcher, David, 1952- :'It looks like we're in for another dull budget.' 'How do you know?' 'He keeps on falling asleep while writing it' Dominion Post, 12 May 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'This country does not bully smaller nations!... And those smaller nations will confirm that.' 'How do you know?' 'We told them to.' Dominion Post, 6 April 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'There's a possibility of a back bench revolt!' 'Who's the ringleader?' 'The one with the pitchfork.' Dominion Post, 4 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We need to do some serious bridge building within the party to get the two factions back together.' 'The gap's too big for a bridge... You'll need a ferry service!' The Dominion Post, 19 November, 2003.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'It's time to get into election mode. I'm going out to do some serious knocking.' 'Doors?' 'Rivals.' Dominion Post, 18 September 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The PM said she wouldn't demote you for speaking your mind....he said, she quite enjoys absolute silence.' The Dominion Post, 19 August 2002.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Politicians need a long break in the New Year... we have to recover from all the Christmas parties we get invited to!' Dominion Post, 6 December 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The PM isn't in favour of banning smacking completely.' 'Why not?' 'She's thinking of introducing it for cabinet members who won't do as she says.' Dominion Post, 5 June 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'You can't have land court judges making decisions on matters they have an interest in!' 'Quite right... It would be like politicians voting to give themselves a pay rise.' Dominion Post, 3 September 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'What was the result of the youth parliament that sat here last week?' 'More mature debating than normal.' The Dominion Post, 23 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'You can't blame the PM for making us pledge our loyalty to the party.' 'No... But I thought making us sign in our own blood was going a bit far!' Dominion Post, 5 May 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'How did the minister's head to head TV debate go?' 'His opposite didn't show. He debated the issue with an empty chair!... And he still lost the argument.' Dominion Post, 24 March 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Are you aware of the new 'no surprises' policy? Ministers must be told about everything!' 'Yes.' 'Where is the Minister?' 'Buried under all that information.' Dominion Post, 17 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The public want a tax incentive to encourage them to save for their retirement.' 'Fine... Tell them they'll have to pay 25% more in tax if they don't join a super scheme.' Dominion Post, 1 October 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Aren't you embarrassed by your pay rise?' 'No!.. If I was in the private sector I'd be paid much, much more!!!' 'So why aren't you?' 'They won't have me.' Dominion Post, 25 October 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'It's time to stand up and be heard!!!... It's election time. Dominion Post, 12 March 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'How is your campaign to get more people to donate their organs, going?' 'So far we've had three hammonds and a wurlitzer.' The Dominion Post, 1 March 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Why do the opposition keep picking on me?' 'You know what they're like when they smell blood... And you've been haemorraging just lately.' Dominion Post, 12 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Is the promise of an extra week's leave for workers, a carrot on a stick?' 'We won't get it for another four years- it's a carrot on a barge pole! The Dominion Post, 11 November, 2003.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Did you see a surgeon about having a tummy tuck?' 'Yes... He said one tuck wouldn't be enough. I'd need pleats.' Dominion Post, 13 November 2004.
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