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A big loss to Labour... "If only we could be half as witty as Michael Cullen!" "True... Wouldn't it be great if we were all half-wits?" 9 April 2009
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I will NOT put up with this kind of thing from a foreign government. Stop any high-level visits that are planned!' 'There aren't any planned.' 'Organise some so we can cancel them.' The Dominion Post, 17 July 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'They may be young and talented, but new MPs can find parliament a confusing place.' 'Yep....Especially if all the signs have been removed!' The Dominion Post, 31 July, 2002.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'The Conservation Department says that the forests are tinder dry and it would only take one idiot to start a forest fire... So they've cancelled your visit.' Dominion Post, 9 January 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We're losing billions in tax revenue from undeclared income! Get a consultant to find ways of combating the problem.' 'Could be expensive!' 'Ask them how much for cash?' The Dominion Post, 19 August 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'If you release unpopular policies just before Christmas no one gets a chance to berate you about it!' '...And another thing....!' Dominion Post, 24 December 2003.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'It looks like we're in for another dull budget.' 'How do you know?' 'He keeps on falling asleep while writing it' Dominion Post, 12 May 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'This country does not bully smaller nations!... And those smaller nations will confirm that.' 'How do you know?' 'We told them to.' Dominion Post, 6 April 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'There's a possibility of a back bench revolt!' 'Who's the ringleader?' 'The one with the pitchfork.' Dominion Post, 4 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We need to do some serious bridge building within the party to get the two factions back together.' 'The gap's too big for a bridge... You'll need a ferry service!' The Dominion Post, 19 November, 2003.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'It's time to get into election mode. I'm going out to do some serious knocking.' 'Doors?' 'Rivals.' Dominion Post, 18 September 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :"Here's a major scandal." Dominion Post, 12 May 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Here's the report on the slow police response times!' 'That was quick!' 'This is the one you asked for three years ago.' Dominion Post, 31 March 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'Under the new anti-spam laws you can only bulk email to people who have requested it... Send out the details to all the spammers!' 'I can't... They haven't requested it.' Dominion Post, 25 February 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'We need to increase election funding for party political broadcasts.' 'The public won't like that!' 'We'll do it gradually... We'll just increase our party's funding to start with!' Dominion Post, 9 March 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :"We've got to stop all these unwanted migrants coming into the country!" 26 May 2005
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I find I'm usually too busy to keep fit... And if I'm not, I can always find another excuse.' Dominion Post, 31 January 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'If someone was listening in on my conversations, what could I expect to hear?' 'Snoring.' Dominion Post, 23 November 2004.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'No one was prepared to stand up an take charge of the proceedings, so we all just sat there!' 'Where was this?' 'At the leadership forum.' Dominion Post, 29 April 2005.
Fletcher, David, 1952- :'I tried to tell the minister his method of giving out grants for trade and industry was nothing more that a lolly scramble... but I got hit in the face by a dollar coin. Dominion Post, 9 December 2004.
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